In my earlier post on expressing one’s feelings, I discussed how we are reluctant to express our feelings due to the fear, “What if I express but I am not heard”.
This is the fear of not receiving validation, and in this post, I will be talking about why it is so important and how we can express validation for others’ feelings and receive validation for our own.
In our times, we are so easily critical of the way people feel.
We decide how people should and should not feel in specific situations, how they should or should not act in a given space and we are more often than not quick enough to judge them and say so.
Validation is not the same as trying to help your child fix their emotions or problems. “It just means that you understand what your child feels is real to her.”It also doesn’t mean letting your child do whatever they want – a common misconception the authors often hear.
For instance, you validate your child’s feeling of not wanting to go to school but you communicate that the action of missing school isn’t an option.“Don’t validate what is not valid.
The concept of validation comes from Marsha Linehan, Ph.
D, a clinical psychologist and creator of dialectical behavior therapy (DBT).Counseling, psychotherapy and psychological assessment are the main focus of Inner Space.You can find the Inner Space website here and read other articles written by her here.Or I feel angry with you now and I’m not being able to help that.If you just hugged me trying to understand what I’m going through I’d feel better. Validation is nothing but an acknowledgement from you to another person communicating that you understand that the other at present is experiencing a particular emotion.Feeling anger is not wrong — it’s certainly normal — and you can validate his frustrated feelings.